Who’s Really Responsible? : Navigating Safety While Exploring Sexual Practices

By: Donnie Hue Frazier III

How often do we evaluate whether or not we are being sexually responsible? What is sexual responsibility, and how does an individual gauge if they are doing their part? There are many layers to this discussion, and it doesn’t stop at simply getting tested. I want to make it clear that discussions surrounding the promotion of healthcare screenings, transmission of sexually transmitted infections, and accessibility to resources/biomedical intervention tools like PrEP, have the potential to activate many feelings for Black queer individuals. While dispensing information into our community, as a Black man who identifies as gay, I think it is extremely important that I do my best to advocate without participating in the projection of fear and manipulative tactics. Specifically those that are often used to encourage others to review and consider available options for the enjoyment and exploration of pleasure and sexuality. 

When it comes to sexual responsibility and accountability, communication is paramount. It is important to be able to establish healthy ways to communicate our needs, desires, and boundaries in order to experience safety within the range of sexual activity. At the end of the day, the responsibility for our health, wellness, and personal practices is in our hands. To hold ourselves accountable for the ways in which we engage is important. However, there is also a very big responsibility that we have outside of ourselves. That is the responsibility to our community, as we find our navigation, discover our niche, and uplift ourselves within sexual spaces. This means that it is up to us to do our part to remove as much stigma, judgment, and abuse from the arena of sexuality, as we can. Whether this is gender expression, kinks, fetishes, sexual health, or consent. Being informed, educated, aware, and compassionate can contribute to the progression of sexual safety within our community. 

To discuss sexuality as a public health topic, we must remove shame from the equation. As Black people, there is often shame and trauma that may surround what it means to indulge ourselves in the nature of living as sexual beings. This is infused in the marketing and media that we consume, and may impact the way we view ourselves. It is important to understand that people honor sex differently, and there are a variety ways to practice responsibly. As much as there has been an advancement of medication, shame toward safety is present in our community. Let’s talk about HIV prevention for an example. There are many people who still choose to use condoms when engaging in sexual activity, while there are people who choose not to use condoms, and are also able to enjoy this type of sex safely. Access to resources and information determine the levels of safety, and an awareness of the modes of transmission, an understanding of which bodily fluids transmit infections, and where to seek services are just as important.

As biomedical intervention tools have made it possible for people to reduce their risk of contracting HIV by several methods, people who may not have an awareness or capacity to gain access to those tools are not left with many options. These methods include: Treatment as Prevention, PrEP (pre-exposure prophylaxis) and PEP (post-exposure prophylaxis). Treatment as prevention is a method used for individuals who are living with HIV to reduce their viral load to the state of being “undetectable”. When someone who is living with HIV adheres to their treatment plan, and is undetectable, the individual cannot transmit the virus to someone who is HIV negative. Although these concepts have been shown in studies to be beneficial, we must also look at things like health equity, availability and proximity to testing services and resources that help prevent the transmission of STI’s, and the trust levels within the community in association with the response to the offerings. Condoms may be a safer option for someone who is not adhering to a treatment regimen or utilizing PrEP. PrEP also only prevents the transmission of HIV, and does not account for protection against other sexually transmitted infections like chlamydia, syphilis, gonorrhea, herpes simplex virus, or human papilloma virus to name a few. 

When it comes to sexual health and responsibility, there is a deep dive into the factors that impact an individual’s decision-making and choices that are also required to make change. Outside of the responsibility that we have to ourselves, so that we can uphold a responsibility to the community, I am seeing how much of a responsibility that structures and systems have to the individuals beyond the basic education and offering of services. It is the understanding of the complexities of the individuals in our community, paired with the art of observation, intentional listening, and a true willingness to customize and tailor the ways in which we serve.

About The Author

Donnie Hue Frazier III is an actor, creative director, and public health communications consultant. Having earned a degree in Sociology and Psychology with a concentration in Human Services, Donnie Hue has worked in the field of Public Health as a consultant for organizations serving the LGBTQ+ community, and believes in using his art and talent to create social change. Donnie’s primary scopes of focus in this work are sexual health prevention and mental health. Mr. Frazier is also the founder of Shades of Hue LLC. which was developed as a production company for cultural entertainment, education, and consulting purposes. Donnie Hue is best known for his work as an actor, starring in the films “Party-N-Play” and “Love The One You’re With” on Prime Video, in the Emmy award winning series “GIANTS” on BET, and has written, produced, and starred in his first feature film “Roux’s Blues: Promise Me, You’ll Be There”.

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